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lundi 15 mars 2010

Same old, same old

OK, I'm not going to regale you with yet more of the same woes (though they most definitely haven't gone away and don't seem likely to in the near (or even distant) future).

I'll just add that tensions are running high chez Magic and that, whilst I am going to my friend's wedding in York next weekend, D has decided that he won't be coming. We've managed to get a refund on the hotel and D's going to try and do the same for his flights, but the trains are a no-go (non refundable tickets, £70 down the drain unless I can somehow flog them) and I am PISSED OFF. Not just about the money, but the fact that he doesn't want to go on holiday just the two of us (it would have been our first time since before C was conceived, in April 2001 when we had a great time in New York). A crap year just gets crapper. Though I'm hoping the wedding will be fun...

And for my allergies, well, the homeopathist has given me a treatment which works a bit. I can more or less breathe, but I sneeze so much I've pulled a muscle in my back (ridiculous, I know). But at least I can breathe...

So. On to the "not moaning" section.

The girls had their school carnival last week and it was fun! Yeah, it was freezing cold, but the kids didn't seem to mind. C was beautiful as a mermaid - I put make-up green-with-silver-glitter algae on her face, and a lovely turquoise scarf in her hair - and the only mermaid at school, and L was just adorable as a skinny little Zorro, zapping her sword about and being a real hero! I was so proud of them!

What else? Not much, to be honest. I'm trying to pluck up the courage to ask my father for money - quite a lot of money, in fact - because debt is mounting so high. I know he'll say yes, but it's just so humiliating to be in this position despite working like a slave and being 40 for fuck's sake.

No progress on our summer holiday - I still want to go to Liguria, but the tension situation is making me wary. Not to mention the money (though it would be a cheap holiday really). Plus we "have" to go to Paris during the Easter holiday to see my MIL from hell (though at least we won't actually be staying with her thank God). Yeah, she's offered to pay the tickets, so I can't use poverty as an excuse for not going, plus the girls are really excited. But me, I'm dreading it already.

Spring really seems to be on its way at last and that's good news. Our drippin tap is going to be fixed tomorrow, which is good news too. And I'm almost finished some outstandingly well-paid translations for the WHO (let's hope they pay quickly!).

So, yeah. There is some positive in there somewhere. It's just horribly outnumbered by the shitty stuff.

Let's just pretend that I didn't moan this time, OK?

dimanche 7 mars 2010

Rhetorical question

As in, I don't really want to hear any answers...

So: 2010, just how much more crappy can you possibly get?

The heavy, deeply disturbing stuff continues to crash all around me but I can't write about it here. Can't even bring myself to write the words, they hurt too much.

In addition to the crappiness of January (death and poverty), the multi-crappiness of February included the aforementioned heavy stuff, plus a stinking cold (no big deal, but a pain in the butt nonetheless) swiftly followed by a vicious bout of stomach flu (barfing galore) followed by the worst case of hayfever EVER RECORDED. I haven't been able to breathe through my nose for 10 FUCKING DAYS. I've tried every over-the-counter crap you can think of (nose sprays, homeopathy, inhalations of Vick's VapoRub, physiological serum...) and nothing works. I can't sleep (it's worse - if that's possible - when I lie down, plus lakes of drool form on my pillow from having my mouth open all the time (you're welcome)), I can't concentrate on the mountains of work I have to do, eating and drinking are torture (can't breathe at all) and OHGODI'MMISERABLE.

I'm going to see a doctor on Monday (I hope) but this promises to be a long, shitty weekend.

In addition to all that, money is still my n°1 stress producer (DEBTDEBTDEBT eating away at me), D still hasn't got a job and I'm just fed up with 2010 already.

Moan, moan, moan. Do I ever do anything else?!