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dimanche 13 janvier 2013

New Year

The New Year's Questionnaire

Instead of an actual update, I'm going to (once again) do this New Year's questionnaire.

In short, for those of you not reading my woefully irregular posts, 2012 sucked big time (and, after only 12 days, 2013 isn't looking great either, but it at least has time to improve).

OK, here we go.

Thanks again to Linda for this...

1. What did you do in 2012 that you'd never done before?

Oh, lots of things, but most of which I wouldn't recommend - getting wasted on muscat every night, becoming almost entirely nocturnal, bla, bla, bla. You get the picture.

2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

No real resolutions, but, having lost over 10 kg in the last 6 months, I am kind of hoping to be able to maintain my new weight.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Yes! My friend Caroline in London had a little boy, Alexander, in November.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No, thankfully.

5. What countries did you visit?

Italy (Milan)

6. What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?

A steady income, mental stability, a normal life (as normal as my life can ever be)

7. What dates from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory and why?

28 August. If you know me, you'll know what happened on that night. If you don't, trust me, you don't want to know what happened that night. But the result of my actions that night is that I'm still in hospital 4.5 months later...

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?


9. What was your biggest failure?

Not surviving very well at all

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Same allergies as every year now apparently, and then the 28 August fiasco

11. What was the best thing you bought?
A fabulous Cath Kidston handbag (in red, not green, though I'm tempted by the green too now) and matching purse - I adore them and I've had so many positive comments about them!

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?

C. Whilst still very much a little girl (she only turned 11 on 27 December), she's shown a great deal of maturity these last few months. Despite all the turmoil in her life (my fault, of course), and despite being the youngest in her class, she still finished the first term top of her class and I am extraordinarily proud of her.

13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?

No one in particular. Maybe mine.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Same answer as last year: trying to keep me and my girls afloat

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?


16. What song will always remind you of 2012?

There are several, first two cover versions: my favourite song ever, Hallelujah, sung by Jeff Buckley, and then his version of Lilac Wine; and then the "Grey's Anatomy" songs - Breathe (Anna Nalick), Chasing cars (Snow Patrol), The Story (Brandi Carlile).

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

a) happier or sadder? I don't think I need to answer that, do I?

b) thinner or fatter? About 10 kg thinner

c) richer or poorer? Also about the same - too in debt, anyway

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?

Laugh, smile, see friends, go out, do things for me

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

Cry, feel sorry for myself, indulge in bad behaviour

20. How did you spend Christmas?

"Alone" in the sense that the girls were in Paris with D and my dad went back to Scotland. But I wasn't actually alone (my psychiatrist won't let me be alone), I was here in the hospital. It was a little bleak and workhouse-y, but not as dismal as I thought.

21. Did you fall in love in 2012?

Not really, but I made some very good male friends (gay ones) and have started a relationship of sorts with a fellow patient here at the hospital.

22. What was your favourite TV programme?

I still enjoy Mad Men, but got totally hooked on Breaking Bad and True Blood as well. I started watching The Big Bang Theory and find it quite funny (rare, for me) so may get into that too.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?


24. What was the best book you read?

I don't actually remember reading any books at all in 2012 - which appals me!
25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Pffff, I'm waaay too old for this question

26. What did you want and get?


27. What did you want and not get?

Love and affection until November

28. What was your favourite film of this year?

I don't seem to see films any more

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 43 (God help me) in May. To be honest, I can't really remember much about it.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Being loved

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2012?


32. What kept you sane?

Nothing, apparently, though I'd say that certain friends (many of whom are very far away) kept me alive

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Pat Monahan - still, but now accompanied by Alexander Skarsgard and Joe Manganiello from True Blood

34. What political issue stirred you the most?

I'm still not really interested in politics, but war being declared on Mali by France is scary stuff (though not, I suppose, technically in 2012)

35. Who did you miss?

My friends in England - I don't see them nearly often enough; my friend in South Africa

36. Who was the best new person you met?

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012

Getting drunk on your own whilst watching depressing music videos all night is not the best way to battle bipolar disorder

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year
Two: first, the same as last year: it's from Train's early hit, "Meet Virginia":

"She pulls her hair back as she screams, "I don't really want to live this life!"
Second, from "Chasing cars" by Snow Patrol:

"If I lay here, if I just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world"