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dimanche 2 novembre 2008

Jet lag

Hmmm... It seems that the clock on this blog is running on Californian time or something... My "first post for NaBloPoMo" was, I promise, written in the (very) early hours of 1 November... Yet once posted, the clock/calendar thing says 31 October at 6.15 pm...
Yet another of life's mysteries, I suspect.
But there's no doubt - today is definitely November! And with grey, heavy skies, imminent rain and lightning all evening, you can't mistake the season.
Matching my mood today, actually.
The likelihood of us having to go and spend Christmas (and C's 7th birthday, which is on 27/12) up in Paris with my mother-in-law is growing daily. I don't want to go, for a whole slew of reasons, the main one being "spending 5 days (or more, God help me) with my mother-in-law in Paris, all four of us (me, D, C and L) having to sleep in what was once D's childhood bedroom". Jean-Paul Sartre's "Huis clos" leaps to mind...
Plus, we've travelled quite a bit this year (which is good, I don't regret any of the trips we've had) and I was hoping to not have to spend 500 Euros on train tickets.
But my MIL's getting snarky on the phone, and D seems to be gradually caving in, and that's left me distinctly peeved, to put it mildly.
We were in Scotland last Christmas (costing 500 Euros, too) and it was OK, but tough too as my father and D don't always see eye to eye.
And I almost never see eye to eye with my MIL.
I know this sounds mean and pathetic - I should want my daughters to spend Christmas with their Mamie. But in the past, she's always come here. Not perfect, and usually pretty tense it has to be said, but at least we're at home and not stuck in Paris with no respite from the tension.
Plus, I remember my childhood Christmases - we were always either at my grandmother's house or at my aunt's. Never at home. My one, recurring Christmas wish was to wake up in my own bed on Christmas morning. And I had to wait till I was 19 to have it come true! I want my daughters to have their Christmas at home, I want C to be able to see friends for her birthday, I want to be with my beautiful cat... Not great reasons, I know, and I'll have to come up with something because I can't tell my MIL the real reason (I can't stand her and don't want to be stuck on her territory). Oh yes - we have a huge roof repair bill due to be paid in January... Hmmm. This might need working on...
And I'm quite willing for my MIL to come here - I've always done my best to prevent her coming at other times of year (she's pretty much impossible to live with), but this time, for once, I'd even be willing to pay for her ticket...
Yup, it's the dark season, and storms are brewing, in more ways than one.

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