Rhetorical question

As in, I don't really want to hear any answers...

So: 2010, just how much more crappy can you possibly get?

The heavy, deeply disturbing stuff continues to crash all around me but I can't write about it here. Can't even bring myself to write the words, they hurt too much.

In addition to the crappiness of January (death and poverty), the multi-crappiness of February included the aforementioned heavy stuff, plus a stinking cold (no big deal, but a pain in the butt nonetheless) swiftly followed by a vicious bout of stomach flu (barfing galore) followed by the worst case of hayfever EVER RECORDED. I haven't been able to breathe through my nose for 10 FUCKING DAYS. I've tried every over-the-counter crap you can think of (nose sprays, homeopathy, inhalations of Vick's VapoRub, physiological serum...) and nothing works. I can't sleep (it's worse - if that's possible - when I lie down, plus lakes of drool form on my pillow from having my mouth open all the time (you're welcome)), I can't concentrate on the mountains of work I have to do, eating and drinking are torture (can't breathe at all) and OHGODI'MMISERABLE.

I'm going to see a doctor on Monday (I hope) but this promises to be a long, shitty weekend.

In addition to all that, money is still my n°1 stress producer (DEBTDEBTDEBT eating away at me), D still hasn't got a job and I'm just fed up with 2010 already.

Moan, moan, moan. Do I ever do anything else?!

Taking shape

I can't quite believe it, but not only am I actually ahead of schedule for NaNoWriMo, but I've already passed half way and am aiming for 27,000 words by tonight.

I'm getting quite excited, because the story is starting to take shape, I have quite a lot of ideas to include and am really starting to believe that I'm actually going to finish this thing. It's a delirious thought, to be honest. And I'm unbelievably proud of my achievement (even if I'm nowhere near finished in reality).

That said, I've been finding it hard to concentrate today. My thoughts keep going back to Claire and her family, and the reports of Charla Nash (the victim of a horrific chimpanzee attack that has left her with terrible, terrible injuries - no eyes, no hands, no nose, no mouth...) haunt me too. I've always found news items like this strangely fascinating, but afterwards, I can't stop thinking about them, empathising with the people involved. It's hard to move on...

Added in to that is the fact that L is not well at all today - at 3 this afternoon she said she was tired and went to bed OF HER OWN VOLITION and has been there ever since. This, if you remember, is the child who NEVER SLEEPS. She coughed all night and has been really peaky all day (no barfing, though, I'd like to point out). I'm concerned, but not (yet) in full-blown panic mode because she doesn't have a high temperature, so I'm hoping it'll just disappear like it came.

But the whole is not particularly conducive to writing reams of pages of my "novel".

However, just thinking about all these pages of text brings a smile to my face, I must admit!

If you haven't tried NaNoWriMo, I heartily recommend it - it's made me feel invincible (up to a point)!