Day 2

Today's challenge: to stop buying clothes on line that I most likely will never dare to wear.



I know, that makes it sound like I buy all kinds of kinky, sexy, lacy, frilly, latex or leather stuff.



WHICH I DON'T.



But what I do (often) buy is stuff that looks great on the internet (ie, on a model who is evidently both much slimmer and much younger than I am) but then either doesn't fit me properly - I know, that means "send it back" or "get a different (usually bigger *sniff*) size", but I'm always too caught up in my "but it'll fit/look great once I've lost some weight" fantasies, so I end up with shitloads of stuff in my wardrobe - or does fit but makes me look like a grounded whale. Either way, I have shitloads of cute clothes in my wardrobe that I can't and/or won't wear. And don't even get me on to the subject of shoes (that's a whole other post, people).



As for yesterday's challenge, well, I guess I've kind of done OK - we had lunch at IKEA and yes, I caved in and took chips with my chicken and green beans. But there weren't many and I wasn't on my own... And then I had a slice of Daim cake... So maybe I didn't do so great after all. But as I said, it wasn't in secret, so I've sort of kept my promise.



For the clothes, it'll be tougher still - all I need is to get an e-mail from one of my favourite on line shops announcing either a mega reduction or a fantastic and extremely desirable free gift and I'll be tempted. But I'm going to try and hold out till after my birthday. Should be possible.



One other thing - after all my stressing and worrying, C's appointment at the doctor showed only that her heart is in great shape. Her murmur is "organic" (like Mrs C. said) and absolutely nothing to worry about. Such a relief!



Of course, the other day L got taken away in an ambulance (though that was mainly because we still don't have a car) with a temperature of 38.7°C and a "sore neck"... Obviously, for C and I (left at home), panic levels were high, me morbidly Googling meningitis and making myself almost hyperventilate and C sad because her little sister wasn't around. But in the end, all was well and D and L came home "tired but happy" with nothing more than a diagnosis of some weird, unknown virus and a prescription for aspirin. But it was stressful all the same. And seeing my sweet baby being driven away in an ambulance WITHOUT ME was horrific.

So. I'm now only 39 days away from turning 40, but my sweet little girls are in good health. All the rest is unimportant.